The world only spins forward

Last week, a friend of Huma Abedin, the wife of shamed Queens and Brooklyn, New York Congressman Anthony Weiner, reporting on Ms. Abedin’s state of mind in the wake of her husband’s scandal, offered this to the New York Times:

“She’s worrying about the bigger picture, her own family, her own life, the baby, how to get back to living a normal life.”

The Times adds:

“The couple is spending the weekend together in the Hamptons.”

No matter how much time they spend in the Hamptons, getting “back to living a normal life” is surely not in the cards for Abedin and Weiner.

It isn’t possible. “Back to…” is a myth.

As painful as it surely is for Abedin, and for all of us to confront tragedy in our lives, we must fully accept that the world moves in only one direction–forward.

Growing from and with the pain

It’s inevitable, in the midst of a great catastrophe, to wish for–strive for–a “return to normal.”

“I just have to get things back to the way they were,” we plead.

“How could I possibly move forward from this?” “What growth could conceivably come?”

There are endless answers, actually. Only the tricky part is that you can only see them once you give up trying to get, “back to normal.” It can only begin with the acceptance of two painful yet powerful words:

It happened.

You’re allowed time to grieve. To nurse your wounds. To cry and contemplate. And then it’s time to get to work.

It happened. You hate that it happened. It wasn’t right that it happened. You wish like you’ve never wished before that it hadn’t happened. But it did. It happened. And the world keeps spinning forward–with or without you, forward.